The spiritual debate over of the question of "what is the right spiritual attitude" to be cultivated towards the objectified reality, the reality of senses, desires, needs, participation in life ,has created so far more confusion than clarity. Many schools are propagating the idea of "detachment" almost as a holy mantra, hoping for this ship to lead them to the shore of liberation. To their perception if a seeker will train oneself to let go of following ones' desires and needs, than at a certain point ,a state of freedom from these desires will be born within one's consciousness.

We find this vision of spiritual practice as one which lacks clarity and has been mostly misunderstood, contributing great amount to the already existing neurosis and confusion within the mind of many seekers. Mainly creating guilt feelings within the hearts of many, who feel that they are not doing "well enough" with denying their desires and needs, and they should be maybe more severe with themselves.

Before we'll discuss the issue of what is the "right state of mind" to hold to towards the issue of "needs and desires", we must first see the meaning and types of desires and needs that one can experience throughout ones' life. For that, We have to first understand that the journey of evolution on earth is a journey of completion and fulfillment. Our soul evolves on earth and makes its' way back to its' source through gaining maturity, expansion of its' energetic depth, accumulation and awakening of inherent wisdom and pure Self-knowingness within it. Such process unconsciously takes place for most people through participation in their own life.
Another point to remember is that each soul arrives with its' own inherent "list" of issues that it will have to grow through in this lifetime, in order to fulfill itself. It is not a mere checklist, or a precise lists of "events" that one will have to go through, But more of certain flavors , energies and challenges will have to be experienced and resolved within ones' life, in order to promote the soul's evolution. Meaning, that the needs that one may experience, or the desires that one might wish to pursuit, may be an important part of ones' evolution, and not ones that should be denied or repressed as "wrong". As going against it may actually regress one's evolution, and create the opposite desired outcome.

The actual challenge is not about finding the "right attitude" towards our needs and desires, but more about finding the "right sensitivity" towards them.The right sensitivity to sense whether a desire, or a need that one experience, is actually coming from the depth of ones' heart, or whether its' just a mental idea which one may pursuit for no real reason nor depth behind it.
For that, one must learn the mechanisms which project these needs into ones' mind. Learning whether its' just a passing wave of mental energy, which usually does not sustain itself for long duration, does not carry a feeling of depth and intimate flavor of importance behind it. Or, whether its' a call from the wisdom of the soul, projecting important intuitive information into ones' intelligence. Telling us, that is an important issue that must be resolved and attained. Such need would usually sustain itself within our mind with a more of a gentle constant presence. Its' flavor will be more refined, yet more solid and continuous. Sometimes, such needs cannot be really dissected nor fully understood, as they will arise more from our intuitive layers of intelligence. Intelligence of Pure knowingness. A direct experience of that which takes place within us, without being able to trace its' roots or causes.

Its' absolutely a great challenge for an average human to distinguish between the "mental" illusory needs and desires which are not really "personal" to ones' heart, and come mainly from unconscious flow of data which one adopts into ones' life, and the gentle intuitive tunes which come from ones' soul, and directing us towards fulfilling that which is important for us to experience and go through in this lifetime. Such learning takes time, takes patience, and demands us to become more gentle and refined with the way we experience the information arises from our intuitive parts.

We can see that one general attitude of "detachment" and what ever rules and judgments come with it, can be actually a quite destructive attitude which may actually create more damage than benefit within our spiritual quest.
If detachment is practiced towards authentic needs and desires which are a part of our souls' blueprint towards its' own evolution and maturation, than we can see clearly how the attitude of "detachment" may cause more damage than benefit .
Yet, once realizing that our mind contains and holds to mental formations that project unnecessary stress to pursuit needs and obsessive desires which are actually not of a service to our soul, but more of an illusion that we hold to, than in such cases , with the right sensitivity , we can say that "detachment" from them will be useful.
We would not even recommend to call it "detachment", but more promoting sensitivity towards higher and deeper needs within us that we can and should, learn how to tune to. respect their presence, and pursuit their fulfillment in a gentle, intelligent and personal way that will serve us best, towards our soul's fulfillment, completion and liberation.